Download “Celebrity” by The Professor of Rap for only $8,
or listen to it online for free!

If Wild Man Fischer, Cole Porter and Ray Davies sat down to write rap music for The New York Review of Books, it would sound something like this.

The Professor turns rap on its ear and gives it a college education. If you like his tracks, donate money & time to an urban youth arts program in your ‘hood.

Currently accepting bookings for oligarchs, titans, and hedge fund managers.


1) Establish a comfortable seated position with proper posture in a conservative flat backed chair. Do not read this website while lying prone. Do not read this website upside down. Do not read this website while bathing.

2) Obtain a 3-ring binder filled with college-ruled loose leaf paper, as well as a pen (blue or black ink only) or #2 pencil (non-mechanical). Take notes frequently, everything on this website may appear on future quizzes and/or tests.

3) If you have questions, raise your hand and wait patiently for assistance. After you have waited at least twenty minutes (but no more than thirty) with no response, you may email the web administrator / custodian, The Adjunct of Funk.


The sidebar contains multiple sections and sub-sections. The sidebar is located on the right side of all pages on the website (unless you are reading the website upside down, which you should not be doing — See “HOW TO READ THIS WEBSITE”). You will be expected to make your way through all of them with ease.

DEPARTMENTS – Links to important locations on-site and off.
Lessons – A list of all posts, regardless of category, poster, or department.
Music – An off-site link to Bandcamp, where all of The Professor’s music is available for download.
Photos – An off-site link to Picasa, which features photos from Post-Cap, The Professor of Rap, and more.

POST CATEGORIES – The sections into which all posts are categorized.
Art Department – Art.
English Department – Writings, letters, musings.
News – Recent information and the latest site updates.
The Adjunct of Funk’s Blog – Posts from The Adjunct of Funk.
The Professor of Rap’s Blog – Posts from The Professor of Rap.